/ The musings and amusings of Mare Martell are cunning, polite, sweet, and vicious. Rarely shying away from things no matter how painful, this site is a tribute to her humanity. en-gb If you don't want to know what I'm thinking, leave now and forever hold your peace. maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Thu, 09 Sep 2010 16:24:57 -0400 Thu, 09 Sep 2010 16:24:57 -0400 http://backend.userland.com/rss e107 (http://e107.org) 60 http://www.maremartell.com/e107_images/Sunsetmoon.jpg / 88 31 The musings and amusings of Mare Martell are cunning, polite, sweet, and vicious. Rarely shying away from things no matter how painful, this site is a tribute to her humanity. http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.469.2 Alone in comraderie
The invisible heart
Unfocused on their part
Crying for tenderness
Flaying spirit from flesh
Singing silent prayers
Indulging every nay-sayer
Rejecting chaos with embraces
Manifesting many masked faces
Dancing haughty with self doubt
Squeaking out mousy shouts
Flirting shamelessly with self loathing
Beyond all Saints absolving
As a pup to its tail
Unraveling betrayal
Rippling muddy reflections
Devouring all confections
Understanding without retention
Beyond all Saints redemption
Believing in triangles of life
Assaulting every strife
Dreading the path of stagnation
Declining familial dictation
Refusing dishonorable duty
Sloughing off old beauty
Warped with injustice
Rebuking what trust is
Regretting what's real
Despairing the alarm bell's peal]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Thu, 02 Sep 2010 22:57:42 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.469.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.468.2 ghostly spirit, a mist
There is nothing that I need
For nobody believes in me.

A mass without redemption
accidental conception

Special Features
deleted scenes

But none of those are me
because I simply don't exist, you see
a shadowed glimpse, an entity
dates in ancient history
shrouded in a mystery
emancipated slave gone free

But
nobody believes in me
They simply don't remember me.]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:48:35 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.468.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.467.2 Pater, Mater
Where did your true love go?
Simple minded
double blinded
Forgotten seed you sewed]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:45:09 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.467.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.466.2 They wait anxiously to stampede into the oblivious ears of the unforgiving/unforgiven Ripper.
He doesn't suspect that his lasso of lies and anger would harness responsibility for his neglect.
She becomes unbridled in her disgust.
She halts without warning, veering suddenly towards truth.
Although she relishes her saddle, for it's beautifully intricate in design,
she bucks against the reason it was placed on her back.
He is negligent to the pain of the branding iron with which he sears her flesh.
He believes he is bigger, better, stronger than she.
She is faster, smarter, and more adept to the environmental changes he affords.
She is her own shelter, while he is oppressed in the presence of his own hearth.
He is entranced by the campfire of hatred.
He is unaware of her riding away, beautiful saddle worn proudly,
into the daybreak of freedom.]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:42:06 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.466.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.465.2 of the paper cup pyramid
that forms the toppling
pedestal of hopes and dreams

Fantasies once honored
are discarded as the
microscope pushes closer
Analyzing, examining
forcing unique views
of ancient situations

Love, if ever it existed
is blown away with a
gust of truth or
as the slithering slide
of cigarette smoke
whisked away on
the winds of shame
guilt, what-if's, and horror

Staring upwards to the fallen
seems futile and as imperfect
as they have left others
to believe that they are.

The air is thin on top
and in the dusty depths
of lost children]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:31:22 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.465.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.464.2 commanding words
innocent danger
demented blurbs
tongue to the ear
violent thrashing
incarcerated fears
bodies crashing
Bed made of blades
intimidating lies
recantation made
horrified cries
Blackout oblivion
eviscerated child
binged out thinking
age gone wild
Redemption sought
convicted by trust
boundaries naught
unrequited lust]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:27:19 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.464.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.463.2 green grey eyes, gauging impact
Uncertain smile, a green light
Proceed with caution
hesitant hands
in an awkward hug-no pats.
Lyrical laughter escapes
forcefully, without warning.
Frightened hands slap
to close the gate
inexcusably tardy
Shame for no control
Guilt for enjoying life
Tourette's loaded
with self-loathing fire
defeats joy before it
takes root]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:23:35 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.463.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.462.2 You never stay
I wish that you would stay that way
You show up long enough to give me hope
Then leave the chaos with me to cope
You shine disaster into every thought
You destroy everything my work has wrought
Then you smile in the way you do
walking away trailing pain behind you
You always leave
You never stay
I wish that you would stay that way
You promise love with words so sweet
I believe the lies and shadowed deceit
With a wave of your hand you turn me away
Leaving me breathless for many a day
Your flashing strength demolishes peace
Causing joy to retreat, happiness to cease.
You always leave
You never stay
I wish that you would stay away.]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Thu, 12 Aug 2010 13:33:44 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.462.2 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.461.2 sorted from the rainbow of stones and settings.
Mother of Pearl, Jasper, Abalone, Jade,
and the favored, Turquoise.
All wrapped in the loving embrace of silver
by a jeweler's hand who created far
from the table where I sat with her,
my Gram.
The faint smell of oatmeal cookies, age
scotch, earth from the basement, heat;
it comforted me. I knew safety.
Piece after piece of beautiful necklaces,
bracelets, watches, earrings, and rings
poured from the case.
Each one with a past.
Each one with a history.
Each one a reminder
that I, the lost child, have a place in this world.
The clocks ticked. Hundreds of them
with their painted or carved antique faces.
They sang the song that again reminded me
that time was slipping past us both.
She pulled out the intricate silver ring.
I tried it on as I had all the others.
It fit my right hand between the bottom
and the first knuckle with a swirling design.
"I wore that one when I won a golf tournament." She said.
"I never wore it again. I was afraid I'd lose the luck."
Then she covered my hand, touching me affectionately.
"I want you to have it."
Even though I'd been through the case
millions of times, every visit,
it was the only ring she'd ever given to me.
I sat in silence, taking in the moment.
That was four months before she died.
The house is gone, the possessions consumed,
money divided, years of history forgotten
into the ashes into which she became.
The ring is broken.
Her voice has faded in my head
so much that the familiar rise and fall of stories
are just words I wrote down from memory.
The way she smelled of lavender and lemons,
faintly of scotch, and sometimes sick.
The way her arms fit around me in a loving embrace
when I finally found the peace I'd sought with her.
All of that has faded into unemotional words
in a poem or a story I now tell.
But that ring. That ring was my way of remembering.
It was the way I conjured up ghostly whispers
of her in the dark of night.
It's the way I talked to her when I become scared.
It's the ring that she shared with me.
The ring is broken.
I am lost without it.
]]> maremartell@nospam.com (Mare Martell) Sun, 08 Aug 2010 21:40:16 -0400 http://www.maremartell.com/news.php?item.461.2